Quite an interesting month as passed. Even though I cannot believe we are already in the middle of the month of Cheshvan, it is also not surprising because of the vast amount that has changed. Cheshvan is called "Mar Cheshvan" or "Bitter Cheshvan" because it has no holidays, and it is also the time when the flood during the time of Noah started (and ended).
During Sukkos (did that already pass too?!) I had a really enlightening conversation with one of the hosts that sparked an understanding of the holiday cycle in a clear way that I had never been taught. While I marvel at it, turning it over and over in my head to taste the ingeniousness of it all, I would like to share the greatness of the holiday cycle.
The month of Elul is the last month of the Jewish holiday cycle (it is only the sixth month on the Jewish civil year cycle). This month is a month dedicated to reflection and planning. We take this month to do things like Slichos (prayers and poems added to liturgy to prepare us for national repentance on Yom Kippur) and do extra mitzvot (commandments) for our merit. I feel that Elul is about planning.We look at the arrows we shot all year long. We realize they didn't hit the target that we desired and so we think about where our new target ought to be.
Then comes the New Year, Rosh Hashana. We demand that Gd, on this day, inscribe us in the book of life. Many people misinterpret this to mean that we will physically live in the next year, but that is a different conversation. Rosh Hashana is a wake up call to tell us that it is our choice to have a spiritual life. If we tell Gd we want to live, then we try to do what he demanded of us. This is so we can live a life connected to Him, the creator and source of all Good. We can draw close to him in observance of the commandments (or the Noahide laws, if your not Jewish) and love, and even simply prayer. If we desire to have a life that is beyond the scope of carbon, if we desire to live a life that is beyond simply staying alive in this world, we need to decide that we are living in the book of life. So Gd inscribes us in the book that we desire. For a wicked man while alive is as if he was dead and a righteous man is alive even when gone. On Rosh Hashana, we draw the new targets for the new year.
We recognize our faults and misdeeds; we recognize what we could do better. This is the Ten Days of Repentance in between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. We start to repent for the things we have done wrong. We don't only repent so Gd will be merciful and have pity on us... which it often seems. We try to examine where we went off our OWN paths and where we deviated from our goals. During the Ten Days, we try to figure out where we went wrong and stay on our best behavior to show Gd that even though we mess up, we are completely capable of changing... even if it is only for ten short days. We measure the projection of the missed arrows.
Yom Kippur comes along and here we are again. Back to that excruciatingly long day were we fast and pray all day. This year, I had the best Yom Kippur in my life. While we intellectually know that this is the happiest day in the year (because Gd forgives us); we emotionally know we are starving, tired, and bored. This year, unlike the past years, I knew I was standing infront of Gd. Not to be judged, but to judge myself. To reflect on my misdeeds and to ask Gd to forgive me and let me try again. When Yom Kippur closed, I know I (along with the entire Jewish nation) was forgiven. This is when I fixed my aim.
The ten days between Yom Kippur and Shmini Atzeret is another important span of time. Four days after Yom Kippur ends, Sukkos begins. Sukkos is a time about spending time with our Father, Hahem. Rosh Hashana was about Gd, our King. Yom Kippur was about Gd, the True Judge. Now, we get to hang out in Gd's, our Father's, house and be embraced by His presence. Sukkot is all about being enjoying and simply being in the presence of Hashem. This is greatly appreciated after the seriousness of the high holidays.
Nevertheless, we don't just experience Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur to forget about it one week later. The ten proceeding days until Shmini Ateret is about DOING. We are supposed to do a lot of good deeds, acts of kindness, and try to drag out the spiritual high we get from all these holidays. Essentially these days are the days of integration.
After the happiness, we get a special holiday the day after Sukkot ends to be "extra happy". Why? Well, we repainted our targets and we fixed our aim (Rosh Hashan and Yom Kippur). We celebrated this success during Sukkot. Then, during the ten days until Shmini Atzeret, we had a practice trial to see how well we shot our new arrows and how well we hit our new targets. Even though it may not have been 100%, we nailed at least a few things. These two months of Elul through Tishrei, we have transformed ourselves into elevated people. We have recalibrate ourselves in ways we have all but forgotten from two months prior. Now, on Shmini Atzeret, we recognize Gd loves us (the Jews, on Simchat Torah, and the entire world, on Shimini Atzeret). We recognize our ability to grow and change. We understand our mission in this world. This is a cause to have a true celibration.
So why, right after do we go into Cheshvan? Mar Cheshvan, Bitter Cheshvan, the same Cheshvan in which the world was destroyed because of wickedness during the time of Noah? Many Rabbis claim that it is a bitter month because there are no holidays. I'd like to agree because even though the Flood started in Cheshvan, it also was the first day that Noah left the ark a year later. Therefore, the fact it has no holidays of its own would make it a bitter, sad month. But, I heard about three years ago that while Cheshavn has no holidays in it now, this is the month that the Third Temple will be rebuilt. A joyous occasion indeed. So what about this month merits the rebuilding of the Third Beit Hamikdash? I am not speaking as a Rabbi, but simply as someone who likes to draw connections.
Now that the intense holiday season is all done and over with, we have a month following with no holidays. The same month that will merit the building of the last Temple. If I would have a guess, the two have something to do with one another. After two months (Elul and Tishrei) of extreme self-work, introspection, and striving to fix imperfection the next logical thing is elevation. The entire month of Cheshvan is about elevating ourselves to a level previous to Elul. We have grown and changed and redirected ourselves in the direction of perfection and ultimate destination. It is only logical after all of this hard work, eventually, Gd-willing soon, the Third Temple would be build shortly following this time.
Until then, I am using Cheshvan as a month not just to go back to my old routine. I am using it as a time to solidify the person I tried to elevate myself to be during the holiday season. Cheshvan is a difficult time full of struggle. It is the battle between old and new, continuing to keep focus on my goals and not going back to what is comfortable and easy. And that is really... well, hard.
Wishing you all a successful Cheshvan that should merit the rebuilding of the Third Temple in Jerusalem.
